This Book Is About Your Life

RESULTS

Hundreds of thousands of Lifespring graduates have turned possibilities into results. For instance,a New Jersey real estate broker reported that her yearly income jumped from $30,000 to $85,000 in the year following her Basic Training. She comments that “During the year following the Basic Training I realized that I was automatically using the principles that I had learned in the training when dealing with my clients. As a result of that my income almost tripled.” She further reports that “I lost ten pounds. Also I became a very calm person. I now look at each problem as a challenge and instead of feeling despair I accept each challenge, solve the problem, and have a tremendous sense of achievement.”

A Connecticut ophthalmologist informs us that"I totally changed my attitude toward my staff members. We are now partners in a common goal instead of adversaries. I make sure they win and thus I win."On a personal note, the same doctor shares that “My sons were barely speaking to me before I took the Basic Training. Now they call frequently,come home often, and are interested in what I am doing."

An engineering manager for TRW in Los Angeles calls the Basic Training “a supportive environment to look inside yourself for the answers to how you can be more effective, and live a richer, more fulfilling life.”His own marriage “has become more open and intimate."

“I have actively participated in the peace movement since the early '60s,"says a New Jersey psychologist. “Through Lifespring I have experienced an internal peace that had been missing." Her experience is echoed by a couple in New York. He, an international financier and attorney, says that “I have a great personal, inner peace.” She, a professional artist:“I am ‘at home’ with myself for the first time in 37 years."As you can see, the benefits of participating with Lifespring range from measurable dollars and cents,to the elusive,priceless sense of having “come home” to yourself.

TAKING ACTION

I acknowledge you for seeking out this vehicle to forward yourself and I invite you to participate in this project as though your life depended on it. Be involved to such an extent that your behavior is “taken over” by your commitment to responsible and effective action. Allow for the possibility that your identity may be defined or redefined in some way through your participation. This is a big request. You can expect to question some of your primary beliefs and confront your automatic behaviors during this investigation. You may see that your beliefswhat you hold to be true about the world-are interpretations that don't serve you. You may likewise discover that some of your actions are counterproductive.

The people who are willing to pay the price now for long-term rewards are the ones who most dramatically transform their lives out of a project like this one. For them, the risks of inconvenience, embarrassment, failure, and other costs are worth the possible gains.The bottom line is “Pay the price now; or pay it later in life, with penalties and interest.” The key is your willingness to change your practices, even in spite of not knowing for sure what the “right” practices are. It is certain that neither you nor any other human being can tap into new possibilities by sticking with the same old practices.

It's simple. The same actions and reactions will only produce variations of the same results and consequences. We call this the “more, better,different”syndrome. “More,better,different” is how we are programmed.It's attractive and has a huge consensus. Who wouldn't want more money, better relationships,and a different job that has no pressure? There’s something to be said about “more, better, different,” but this quantitative arena is often not the one that affects the quality of your experience. You may in fact find “more, better, different” happening in your life as a result of this process. However, if that is all that happens, you have won the booby prize-it will be an accidental stroke of luck with no solid foundation you can rely on in the future. The purpose of this project is to cause a quantum leap that permanently shifts the quality of your experience of life.

How is this leap different from the “more, better, different” syndrome?“More, better, different" merely entails a change in the contents of your life. The kind of leap we are dedicated to encompasses a shift in the context from which you operate-the container in which you hold the specific contents of your life. Not only are you better equipped to change your specific results (to achieve “more,better, different"), but your experience of what can't be changed becomes one of opportunity rather than resignation.

This project clearly aims at more than just getting more of what you now know you want. Beyond improving your current situation, you will develop practices that will dispose you to peak performance permanently and in the face of unforeseen challenges. You will also be contributing to others. Through manifesting your commitment to a quality life, you will contribute to the transformation of the entire planet. You will see how profoundly the world is affected by your presence.It is not necessarily expected, nor desired,for you to change your values. Simply be willing to scrutinize the way your identity has been sculpted through your interpretations and actions, and examine honestly whether that is in line with your vision for your life.

BEING “AT STAKE”

It is one of the facts of life that the most benefits are available through the highest level of participation. “No guts, no glory.” Participate every moment as though your life and sanity were at stake. The difference between playing as if your life were at stake, and not playing at that level is well illustrated through this analogy. Bring to mind the last time you were on an airplane. If you had looked around during the emergency procedures instruction, what would you have seen? Most likely, you and your fellow passengers were reading or talking during that part of the flight-in short, you were oblivious to the announcement. Probably you were more concerned with the book you were reading or the person sitting in the next seat than you were about the use of the oxygen mask. Maybe you looked around casually to check where the nearest exit was located, but having flown before, you didn't feel the need to pay much attention to the rest of the information. So far, your flights had all gone smoothly. If something happened, you were certain that you would remember what to do. Now, picture a new scenario. You are in the air. A voice comes over the speaker informing you and your fellow passengers that you have just lost an engine. The flight attendant then begins instructing you according to the same emergency procedures you have heard on countless other flights. How attentive are you this time, and how much more valuable is the experience?The higher the stakes, the more purpose and passion you muster up. That is what I mean when I suggest that you participate as though your life and sanity depend upon it. Not as if you will lose your life or your sanity if you don't participate at this level, but as if what you have to gain by full participation is as precious as life and sanity.

The thought that “One hundred percent is possible one hundred percent of the time" is an empowering source of action. If you live each moment, take each action, speak each word,as though you could cause absolutely anything, you will not only feel more alive,but you will be more effective.

URGENCY

If this were the last year of your life, what changes would you be committed to making? With only one year left, what would you want to accomplish in your relationships? Your work life? Your family life?

Your community involvement? The obvious message here is about urgency. There is a saying: Yesterday is a cancelled check; tomorrow a promissory note; the only legal tender is now. Don't wait for something other than your own commitment to put you into action.(“As soon as I get my degree; as soon as I get married; as soon as my kids are grown. . . .") Life for many of us is about getting ready to begin to commence to think about preparing to get started, real soon. Unfortunately, while we are waiting for some person or some event to move us, our own commitment to life remains at least partially dormant. We use similar reasoning retroactively to explain why things haven't turned out the way we wanted them to.("If only I hadn't gotten married so young; if only I had told the truth sooner; if only my boss had been more understanding. ...")

Now, these words are not all that new.You may have been asked before about how your life would be different if you had only a short amount of time left. The difference between then and now is that this time you are not requested to simply engage in a reflective process. This time we are talking about committed action and actual results Part of the process may include some reflection and introspection, but you can count on this process to support and empower you to have your commitments show up in your day-to-day living. Not only will we support you in breaking through to a new level of effective action now, but you will have breakthrough technology available to you forever.

BREAKTHROUGH

Breakthrough is defined as “An act or point of breaking through an obstruction... a sudden advance especially in knowledge or technique." In the context of the Basic Training, an obstruction is simply a closure in your life, a possibility that is not available to you now, given how you operate. Einstein's articulation of the theory of relativity was a breakthrough. The facts of the physical universe were no different before Einstein revealed relativity than after. But the possibilities that immediately opened up for humanity were both unprecedented and unpredictable. What had previously been unknown, closed territory for science, was now wide open and available. Similarly,the actual content of your life may not change dramatically in a short period of time (you might have the same job,home, family,body, etc.), but by virtue of the discoveries you make during this process, previously unimaginable advancements will become possible. By breaking through obstructions, we do not mean fixing problems, or uncovering and working on deep-seated psychological blocks. What we do mean is unlocking the gate to higher possibilities than are currently within your reach. Einstein's discovery and thousands of other breakthroughs in music,art,business,the sciences, human relations, and all fields of human endeavor, illustrate that breakthroughs do not only occur in problem areas. You don't have to be doing poorly to get better. Breakthrough is the ticket to excellence at all levels of human progress.

TRANSFORMATION

To transform means to change in composition or structure, to change in character or condition, to convert. Thus,a transformation is an act, process, or instance of substantive changing. At the expense of disappointing you, I will tell you that transformation doesn't automatically mean changing the content of your life-and, as a by-product of transformation, the content of your life may change. For example, your marriage may improve, you may get that promotion, you may lose weight, you may find yourself attracting more people to you, and so on. But it won’t be because you learned “how to” achieve these desired results here. It will be because you experienced transformationa change of character, condition, composition, or structure.

Certain aspects of human beings can't change-our history, for instance.The extent to which those aspects determine who you are constrains the possibility for change. Therein lies the power of transformation; the possibility of looking at yourself and the world in a new way can liberate you from a fixed, rigid sense of reality-even the aspects of reality that are, in fact, unchangeable.

Another way to say this is that the context from which you operate can always change even if some of the facts of life cannot. “Context” is the invisible environment, the interrelated conditions, the structure of interpretation in which your life occurs. The context of your life is like water to a fish. The fish doesn't see the water, isn't necessarily aware of the water, doesn't think about the water. And yet, everything in a fish's world is consistent with and generated from the fact that the fish exists in water. Similarly, everything that shows up in your life, every word you speak, and every action you take, is naturally consistent with and indicative of your context.

If you introduce something foreign into an unsupportive context, it will probably not last. For instance, if you plant a fern (content) in the desert (context), it will not live. Likewise, if your general context is joyless, any experiences you have of joy are likely to be rare and temporary. Ferns die in the desert, and joy can't thrive in a joyless context. People who function from a context of scarcity typically do not have enough money,time,friends, confidence,education,and so on, to accomplish their dreams. Conversely, those who operate from a context of abundance typically generate the resources to manifest their commitments. Why? It can't always be explained by analyzing the circumstances. Often, those who have the least conducive circumstances end up unpredictably successful, and those with all the resources to begin with don't make it. That indicates that there is something beyond or underneath the content-circumstances-that, to a great degree, determines what is possible for someone.It isn't pure luck or talent that permits some people to succeed consistently regardless of the circumstances, while others fail. The good news is that you can shift your context, thereby reshaping your possibilities. That is what we call transformation.

The content of your life gives you valuable information about the context from which you live. However, the most effective way to generate change is by transformation-a conversion of the context that dictates your actions.

Transformation does not imply a need to change your fundamental principles. If you are not clear about your principles, you have the opportunity here to get clear, to declare, what you stand for as a human being. Then, you can explore whether or not you have a context established that generates actions that support your stand.

YOUR PURPOSE

This process is about everything crucial to adult life that you weren't taught in school. What are your goals from this opportunity? In what areas of your life are you looking for new possibilities, new accomplishments? Maybe you intend to give new meaning to your relationships (marriage,family,social,business,community,with yourself); maybe you want to advance your communication skills, your business performance; maybe you want to get clear about your goals, address a management problem, or complete a specific project you've been grappling with. Take time to reflect on your vision of the value you could generate through this vehicle.

If you look at life from a black-or-white perspective, you'll see that you either have the results you say you want, or all the reasons why not. It's binary and it's deceptively simple. Reasons or results. All of us have mastered rationalization and justification because of our need to be right, our need to cover up the consequences of our actions. It is automatic for us to give reasons and explanations in all situations. Reasons,in a sense, have us.

Human beings are particularly resourceful and tenacious about finding reasons to explain why we don't do what we say we are going to do. The good news about reasons is that they make you feel good, or let you be right,at least in the short run. Reasons,rationalizations, and justifications disguise the simple fact that you didn't do what you said you would or wanted to do. You or someone else is still left dealing with the facts, regardless of how adept you are at justifying and deflecting your accountability.

Here are some questions and suggestions to assist you in beginning to explore this in your own life. Write your responses down in your journal.

• When you break your word and don't do something you said you would do, what excuses do you most frequently give? Where or on whom do you place the blame-yourself; your boss; the economy; your parents; your children; sudden,unexpected circumstances; not having the time; other?
• Consider that you only use those reasons to cover up something. What might it be?
• What would it take from you,and what would you gain, from being able to say simply 'I'm sorry. I didn't get it done'? This week, try to dispense with your reasons.
• What would it take from you, and what would you gain from being able to decline the unwanted requests of others without explaining your refusal? Try it this week.
• What reasons are you likely to come up with if you don't accomplish what you say you want out of reading this book?

Let's address your specific concerns. What is going on in your life right now? What is next for you? Why are you reading this book? Write your thoughts in your journal.

The Constitution of the United States,which was written out of respect for the dignity of the individual and our system, is structured to protect and ensure individual liberty. However, there is no guarantee that you will have the courage to exercise your liberties in ways consonant with your highest aspirations and in accordance with the maximum benefit to society. Lifespring is dedicated to opening these possibilities to you, to turning abstract political rights into genuine personal accomplishments. Engaging in this inquiry can't guarantee that you will succeed, in an objective sense, in everything you do, but our work together can empower you to take the necessary risks and to participate with all you've got-to take full advantage of your freedom. There are very few events that can intervene in your life the way the kind of commitment we are discussing in these pages can-to enable you to act on the aspirations expressed in our Constitution.

You have the opportunity to see where you are, where you want to be headed, and where you are going to end up given the direction you are heading now. Participating one hundred percent in this exercise involves risk. Exploring the topics raised here provides a kind of laboratory where you can play out your risk taking. These aren't undo risks-they don't threaten your physical or psychological well-being. You risk identifying the inauthentic self-image you project to others. You risk having to take a real stand-a stand demonstrated in your actions-either for or against the ideals that you claim to endorse.

Your investment of time,energy, and money will only generate progress for you if you are motivated by a commitment to truly get something done in your life. This book can be a vehicle for your accomplishment. But it cannot cause anything in your life. Only you cause action in your life. This inquiry is an opportunity for you to clarify your principles, priorities, and goals,and to break through in your ability to express yourself authentically, powerfully, and effectively.

This book is about your life. It is not full of answers, contains no easy steps to happiness, and will not instruct you in a technique for “how to” improve yourself. The possibilities this book opens up for you will come out of your own commitment to changing your practices. The promises I make to you are that our interaction will further the commitment you have to your life, will transform your sense of peace and well-being, and that through your participation you will significantly increase your ability to act effectively and produce the results you say you want.

A word that has been played down so far is “fulfillment.” What good would self-examination be if it didn't result in fulfillment? Fulfillment is a matter of interpretation, a personal issue. For my money, fulfillment is born out of passion, commitment, and effective action. I assert that if you are committed to living as though your life actually depends on it, you will be fulfilled.

Let's look at the reasons you decided to give this book a chance. Maybe you are a graduate of the Lifespring courses. Maybe a friend has been trying to get you to take a Lifespring course and this is your compromise. Maybe you devour “self-help” books. Maybe you want to prove to yourself once and for all that Lifespring is a fraud. Maybe you are just curious.

There is nothing wrong with those reasons, but a commitment to curiosity, or to obtaining information, or to satisfying a friend, or to being right, will not get anything accomplished in your life. From this point on, I request that you read as though something in your life were really at stake. Naturally, you are free to decline my request-but what if something here could actually enhance your life? Who would be losing? Allow for the possibility that this experience may be a catalyst for making an extraordinary difference in your own life.

Consider the questions posed below, and, out of your commitment to accomplishment, take action.I recommend, once again,recording your thoughts in your journal.

• What is your purpose in reading this book?
• What is really your purpose in reading this book?
• If you accomplished the breakthroughs you are aiming for, specifically how would they affect your life?
• What is the effective action you need to take to accomplish what you say you want?
• What is your vision for your future?
• What is missing or what is needed to accomplish that vision?